too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
