Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
