On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize
