I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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