I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
