Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize