Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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