I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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