Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Randomize
