please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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