This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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