We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize