I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Randomize