people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
