we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
