and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
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