I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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