Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
