i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
