the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
