But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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