farters have to be the big spoon...
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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