Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
