He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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