Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
