dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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