Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize