we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
