I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
