Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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