K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
