your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
