i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
