ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
