at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bag of teeth...
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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