If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
