It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
