It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
She bit a glass in half.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
