around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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