i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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