i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
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