I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
