Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
