Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
this beer tastes like vomit already
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
