Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
