And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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