I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
