Umm I'm too high to move.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
