a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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