I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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