We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize
