it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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